As someone who has constantly found countless reasons to be upset, I know that some insecurities can eat you up inside if you let them. I also know that I am by no means an expert on this topic, but this is more so to share my opinion about how my insecurities consume me.
Somedays they are but a distant memory, other days I am consumed by the thought of, how I am not doing enough, I am not worthy enough, smart enough, pretty enough, lovable enough, fit enough just not being enough. It's rough when a lot of the time I similar to many have the tendency to compare myself with other people.
But in reality, I do not know what they are going thru to be where they are today, and that's often removed from our monologue. We are so fixated on all the ways they might be doing better than us, that we forget to think, that they might be issues too, problems, or demons they are constantly dealing with. That A., not everything is as it seems, B. grass is always greener on the other side, C. have compassion for people even when you cannot see what might not be working for them, and D. life is not a competition, we are all on our own journey and comparing yourself with others is not the answer.
On the other end, I look back at some of the insecurities I had as a child, teenager and even a couple of years ago, some of them seem too silly and stupid now, but at that moment god forbid someone made fun of me/ taunted me about it. We grow, adapt, and change constantly, and our insecurities change with them as well.
Every day I just try to remind myself that there are things I do not have answers to, and some I will never have answers to but I cannot dwell on what I have no immediate control over. In the past, I would give in to my insecurities and overcompensate, but now I am realizing there is no benefit in that, and all it would do, was constantly give me that pit in my stomach.
I sometimes catch myself judging people a little when I know someone is overcompensating out of insecurity and I catch myself and I remind myself that it can happen to anyone and it's harder when you are on the other side.
I work out and try to eat healthily, I know may not look the way I want to in everything I wear, but I am trying and I keep trying while realizing it's a process and everything takes time, and it's foolish to assume everything will work out instantly. Patience is hard, but I am learning how to embody it without letting my anxiety get the better of me.
What is changed tho is that I do not have an unhealthy relationship with some of the insecurities I did when I was younger, so even though I am not where I want to be I know that one day I will be and there is no need to rush.
